Secret Identity

FrackLord: Our little superhero did it again.

ColorMeHuman: What's the damage this time?

FrackLord: Three street cameras and one cell phone video. I'm working on stopping the propagation on social media right now. Can you take care of the cameras?

ColorMeHuman: I'll get @Radkey to do it. He is much better than I am at that shit. Where did it happen?

FrackLord: 63rd Street. At the intersection after arresting a purse snatcher.

PussLauncher: There are four private cameras at a minimum facing that intersection. Or did you all forget that is a business district?

ColorMeHuman: That's why we don't do this by ourselves. You going to handle those? 

PussLauncher: Yeah. @BlackHips and I will handle it. Will give me an excuse to come over to her place.

BlackHips entered the chat

BlackHips: @PussLauncher You don't need an excuse. ;)

ColorMeHuman: We're on a time crunch. Are you two going to be able to focus?

PussLauncher: Don't worry about us. We'll get it done.

BlackHips: @ColorMeHuman What are you going to do? 

ColorMeHuman: The hard part…

ColorMeHuman left the chat. 

FrackLord: Always so dramatic.

PussLauncher: We should probably get to it then.

BlackHips: Then get your boney white ass over here.

PussLauncher: Yes ma'am ;)

PussLauncher left the chat. 

FrackLord: I'm almost done with my end of things. How long do you think it will take you two?

BlackHips: If he is properly motivated...less than an hour. 

FrackLord: Do I want to know what that involves?

BlackHips: I'm sure you can guess. 

FrackLord: gags

BlackHips: You're just jealous.

FrackLord: Yep. That's it.

BlackHips: I'll message you when we are done.

FrackLord: With which part?

BlackHips: :)

BlackHips left the chat.

Adam sat at the desk, still dressed in his cyan jumpsuit. His red cape was draped behind his seat as he sat there, reading the chat room conversation on a laptop. Behind him was a man and a woman, both dressed in white polos, waiting for his response. Adam turned his head around to face them.

"What is this?" Adam asked. 

"These are the people who have been hiding your identity. This is just one of their most recent conversations," the woman said, crossing her arms.

"Who are they?"

"Hacktivists. I guess in some ways you could call them your guardian angels," the man said.

"They believe if your identity gets out, several crime syndicates will come for you," the woman added.

"But it has gotten out. People have definitely seen me with my mask off," Adam said.

"Which is all the more impressive. They have been able to scrub all information regarding you on the web."

Adam's head sank. "So, you didn't find anything about me?"

"No. But we did you one better. We found two of the hackers," the woman said. 

"Really? Where?" Adam said, perking up immediately.

There was a thud heard from the other side of the wall and laughing. 

"They are in the next room."

Adam pulled out a roll of hundred dollar bills that was attached to his thick black utility belt. "Thank you. I really appreciate this."

The woman swiped the cash from his hand and counted the money while Adam went into the hallway. He could hear more commotion going on inside the apartment and a woman's muffled scream leaked out of the door. Out of instinct, Adam kicked the door in. The door shot across the apartment until it smashed into the wall. He took a step inside and the room was a mess. Sprawled on the floor was a broken lamp, end table, and even the couch was tipped over. His first whiff of the room was the smell of a pizza getting burnt in the oven. Laying amongst the chaos was a heftier black woman straddling a thinner bald man. Both were wearing headphones and their lips were infused with passion for one another.

"Ahem," Adam said, clearing his throat. The two kept going at it, unaware of his presence. He was at least thankful they were both still fully clothed. "Ahem."

The man released his kiss and his eyes grew to the size of apples when he saw Adam standing there.

"What's wrong?" the woman asked her man before she turned her head and saw Adam. "Adam?"

"Is everything alright here?" Adam asked.

"Yes. Yes, of course! I can't believe you are here. Adam Joreff—I mean Captain—" the woman said, taking off her headphones.

Adam raised his hand up. "No need to call me by my superhero name. It would be like me calling you BlackHips after knowing yours."

"How do you know her username?" the man asked.

"I had just got done reading an interesting conversation in your chatroom or whatever you call it. Do you mind telling me your real names?"

"My name is Jamila. And this is Kenny," she said, getting off of Kenny.

"What do we owe this great honor?" Kenny asked, standing up.

"I thought someone was in danger. Sorry about the door by the way," Adam said.

Jamila blushed and looked at Kenny, who gave her a reciprocal smile. 

"I guess we forgot how loud we get," Kenny said. 

"Is there anything we can get you Cap—I mean Adam?"

"No. I was actually hoping you could help me out with something."

Jamila and Kenny both stood up straight. Their favorite superhero was asking them for help. It took everything in their being not to shout with excitement. 

"Anything for you!" they both said in unison. 

"Great. Do you two still have any photos of me when I am unmasked? I'll take anything I can get."

Jamila blushed again, burning hotter than the sun. She shifted her weight on her feet and avoided eye contact. "I might have one or two."

"I thought we agreed to destroy them all?" Kenny asked Jamila.

"We did...but…" Jamila couldn't finish her sentence, continuing to look at the ground. 

"Can you get them for me?" Adam asked. 

Jamila hesitated for a moment before walking into a back room, passing the door that was pinned into the wall. Kenny waited with Adam in silence, both interested in why she was acting so strange. After some tussling of papers in the other room subsided, she came back with a few worn magazines.

"Here is everything I have of you," Jamila said, handing him the small stack magazines. 

Adam paged through one of them quickly to make sure there was something of him in there. What he discovered was something far more troubling. On every page was a cut out of him or his face, either plastered over the person on the page or she made her own scenes with full images of him and her in…interesting positions. It was not what he was expecting, but he now understood why she was embarrassed. He kept paging through until he found a decent photo that didn't appear to be cropped or modified in any meaningful way. It was of the time he captured the infamous bank robber, Harlet Carie. He literally was holding her up by her hair like a trophy. Adam smiled, recalling the fond memories. He closed the magazine and gave the rest back to her. 

"Thank you for your help on this matter. You have no idea what this means to me."

"We are happy to help!" Kenny said. "What is it for?"

"I can't tell you. It's for your own protection," Adam said. 

Kenny and Jamila looked at each other with grand smiles. Jamila even let out a little squeak. They were so excited, they didn't even notice the black smoke that was coming from the oven.

"Oh, your oven is on fire," Adam said, pointing to it.

Jamila looked over and ran toward the oven. "Get the fire extinguisher!"

Kenny ran into the backroom and Adam took that as his cue to leave. He got a few steps down the hallway before the fire alarm screeched inside their apartment, echoing down the hall. Adam chuckled to himself and grabbed his phone that was magnetically attached to his belt. He typed away on his phone as he went down the grungy stairwell that blocked out the sound of the fire alarm.

Adam: I finally have proof.

Jerry: Sure you do. Just cause my sister says you're her hero, doesn't make you an actual superhero.

Adam: I have it in my hands as we speak. Do you remember the infamous Harlet Carie?

Jerry: This is getting weak. You have been telling me for the last month you capture all these villains, yet I never see your name in the paper. Just admit it. You aren't a superhero. 

Adam: You're gonna eat those words. 

Jerry: I still wish my sister married your friend instead. What was his name again? Barry? Barney? At least he didn't constantly try to convince me he was some superhero.

Adam: His name was Barkley. I'll be at your place soon enough. If you're not convinced after seeing this, you will never be.

Jerry: Ugh. Fine. I'll be here until five.

Adam: See you soon.

Adam put his phone back on his belt and pushed open the door to the street. He had a skip in his step as the rain started to fall. Nothing was going to ruin his day. It had finally come. The day he was going to prove once and for all he was the one and only, Captain Whirlwind.

***