Chooser of The Chosen One

A frail old man held up an oversized card with a picture of someone on it and a name scribbled below.

"Not him," The Chooser said, giving it a cursory glance.

The old man tossed the card amongst the sea of cards that covered the floor and reached up to grab another card from the stack next to him. The Chooser paced back and forth, parting the sea of unchosen cards with his feet. The old man shook, reaching for the next card.

"Are you sure this is the best way to select the next Chosen One?" the old man asked, his voice shaky and hoarse. 

"If you have a better idea, I am all ears," The Chooser said.

The old man held up the next card. It was a picture of a simple woman with hair as dark as her skin and green eyes. The Chooser stopped pacing and went in closer to get a better look.

"Is she the Chosen One?" the old man said, hoping this tedious task would be over.

"No, but WOW she is beautiful. Tasha."

The old man tilted the card toward him. "I guess so."

"Guess so? You must be blind in your old age."

"We have passed so many people they all look the same to me."

"That's why you don't have the gift."

"We passed plenty of suitable candidates. I'm starting to think you don't know who is supposed to be The Chosen One."

The old man was right. The Chooser had no idea who to pick. His mom and dad always told him he would just know. An instinct. The problem was no one seemed worthy. After seeing millions of faces from all over the world, he was still no closer to choosing. The only person who stood out this whole time was Tasha, which gave him an idea.

"I need to speak with Tasha."

"The woman on the card? Why?"

"She is the Chosen One."

"You just said a minute ago she–"

"Nevermind what I said. Take me to her."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"The Chooser can never speak to the Chosen One."

"Fine she isn't the Chosen One. Happy?"

"No. I'm confused."

The Chooser smacked his palm over his own face. "Can you just take me to her? Please."

The old man flicked the back of the card, creating a blue and gold portal of fire to open up.

"Make it quick. I don't want to be at it all day with these cards."

The Chooser stepped through the portal and was whisked away to a cottage in the middle of a field. The portal appeared on the ceiling and dropped The Chooser in the kitchen. He smacked his head on the corner of the wooden table while falling to the floor. Tasha threw her kettle of soup in the air, startled by the commotion behind her.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" she asked, holding her ladle like a baseball bat. 

The Chooser rubbed his head and looked up at her. "Hello. I'm The...Chase."

"The Chase?"

"I mean Chase. Sorry, my head is kind of spinning right now," he said, holding his head.

"What are you doing in my house?"

Chase pointed to the ceiling. The portal still swirling blue and gold. Tasha jaw dropped and looked back at Chase. 

"You're a wizard," she said.

"No. I'm...well..."

She put down her ladle and knelt beside him. "Are you hurt? I can't have you die in my own home. Our home."

"I'm not a wizard–"

"My aunt told me a wizard would visit me. She never said he would be so handsome. Oh this is so exciting!" she said touching his face.

"Again not a wizard," he said, sitting up.

"Then explain the portal you created above us?"

"I used it to come here. To talk to you."

"Yes I'll marry you!" she screeched, giving him a hug so tight it would have turned a bunny into paste.

Chase sat there confused why she was coming on to him so strong. Sure she was a beautiful woman, but this was...unexpected.

"Come again?"

"You are the man from my aunt's vision. A wizard. That will take me as his bride and we will shire the Chosen One who will save all humanity. Or at least that's how my aunt tells it."

Chase pondered this new information. It would explain why he was unable to choose anyone. And why she stood out to him in the endless sea of cards. But his parents never mentioned anything about finding a wife. Let alone being the creator of the Chosen One.

"So we are supposed to get married? And the Chosen One is supposed to be our son?"

"Daughter. But yes," she said, grinning ear to ear.

"This is a lot for me to process."

"That a beautiful woman wants to have a baby with you? You don't give yourself enough credit."

"So what? I'm supposed to just marry someone I don't know because her aunt made a prophecy."

"...yes…" she said, realizing she may have come on too strong with him.

He tapped his finger underneath his chin, looking into her glowing emerald eyes. She was a one of a kind, but the idea of marrying someone so fast made him nervous. There was only one way to ease his nerves.

"I'll tell you what. Do you have a coin?" Chase asked.

"I sure do," she said, reaching into her pocket, all too ready with a gold coin. One side of the coin had their leader, Mortamus stamped in it and on the other was a picture of a horse.

"Heads, I marry you. Tails, I don't," Chase said.

"Go ahead already," she said giddy.

He flipped the coin. It was about to touch the brick floor when she hugged him again. "See, it was destiny!"

She never looked at the coin and didn't need to. It was heads. Chase picked her up and really looked at her for the first time. She was over the moon for him, bobbing her head as he held her still. Her smile beaming so bright it could blind people. He felt a flutter in his chest like he never had before. 

"I guess that settles it. I choose you."

Doppelganger Girlfriend

DON’T OPEN THE DOOR! THAT’S NOT ME! These words kept spinning around in Jim’s head while he stared at his phone. He looked over his shoulder and saw his wife laying on the fluffy brown sofa. Her eyes were closed and her arm dangled over the edge. Jim clicked his wife’s picture on his phone and put the phone to his ear.

“Honey, you didn’t open the door did you?” Alexis said frantically over the sound of a car horn.

“If I am talking to you now...then who is this on my couch?”

“You let her in!”

Jim walked over to the window and saw his wife’s white Honda out front by the curb. “I let my wife into her home. Yeah that’s how it works. How did you steal my wife’s phone?”

“Jim, whatever you do, don’t sleep with her. I’m coming home right now!”

The line went dead. Jim put his phone back in his pocket.

“Don’t sleep with my wife? What a weirdo,” he said to himself.

Jim turned around and his wife sat up from the couch, taking off her brown apron, revealing just a plain white shirt with a brown stain in the middle.

“Who was that?” she asked.

“Do you have your phone?”

“No, someone stole it. Who was that?”

“I think it was your thief. She texted me. When I called your number, this woman answered and spouted off nonsense like not to open the door or that you weren’t my wife.”

“Oh my god. Do you think she knows where we live?”

Jim walked over and sat down next to her. “I doubt it.”

“What if this woman does know? What if we are in danger?”

“Don’t worry, I will protect you.”

She cradled his arm and leaned her head against his shoulder. She smelt like fresh coffee grounds. He placed his hand on her lap and squeezed her thigh. Her blue eyes shot up to his.

“Did she say anything else?”

“She did say not to sleep with you. Like I said, what a weirdo.”

She laughed. “That is weird. How did she know I wanted to sleep with you?”

“Ha ha. I know right,” Jim said, getting up from his seat. She pulled him back down to the sofa and straddled him.

“Oh, you weren’t kidding.”

“I never kid,” she said and went in for a kiss.

Before their lips met, the house entrance caved in as a white Honda drove straight through the house. Debris filled the living room and dust particles floated in the air. Inside the vehicle two arms were wrestling with the puffy white airbag. The door opened and a woman emerged from the car with a handgun in her hand. Jim looked upon the woman with confusion. It was his wife. Alexis. Her hair was frazzled and blood was dripping from her nose, but it was her. Dressed in the same apron and shirt.

Alexis raised the handgun. “Let go of my husband!”

“Protect me, Jim!” the woman said, holding Jim tighter.

Alexis did not hesitate. Before Jim could react, she fired. Bang. Bang. Bang. The impostor rolled off of Jim onto the white carpet. Blood and chunks of flesh were all that was left of her face.

Jim still held his arms up like he was still holding her. “Alexis?”

She went up to him, gun at her side and kissed him. It was Alexis all right. Her lips tasted like peppermint and her tongue tickled his teeth.

“Baby, I love you, but right now we need to go.”

“What’s going on?”

She pulled him up from the couch. “I’ll explain on the way.”

Jim looked back at the impostor one last time before getting in the car. The rest of the house collapsed as she backed up and spun the car around. They drove off into the night and were never seen again.

Clock Woman

"No! Don't step on that!" I yelled at her.

"Yeah right. Like I'm going to fall for that," Clock Woman said.

She took one step on the cobblestone floor and her head flew clean off her shoulders into the lava pit next to her. Her red cape covered her body that rested there on the pressure plate I made. The scythe rocked back and forth, dangling above her lifeless corpse. Dammit. I closed my eyes and opened them again. I was back on my uncomfortable throne in my castle and she was nowhere in sight. Just like the other 1825 days.

I don't know why, but I have been reliving this same day over and over again. It was supposed to be my greatest achievement. Taking down my arch nemesis, Clock Woman. What a terrible name and her suit was worse. Basically a white and red wetsuit with a red cape that had a clock on it. All it did was hide her flawless night sky complexion. Anyways, the first few days felt like deja vu or a strange dream where I did nothing but walk a few steps. It was only when I was able to walk around the castle grounds to check on my traps I realized what was happening.

I walked out to the courtyard and there she was. Posing with her hands on her hips, proud of her achievement of getting past the gator moat. My lush green shrubs outlined the light colored dirt path between us.

"I am the Clock Woman, Keeper of Time! Your time is over, Valencore!" she said, pointing at me.

God I love that line. Too bad she was never right.

"Come and get me."

She ran at me full force and made it about five steps before she disappeared in an explosion of dirt and red mist. Landmines are a bitch. Once she died my day would reset. These deaths went on for years and each time I got less satisfaction. It became a prison and I only made it worse when I tried to stop her from coming.

When my day would reset, I had about thirty minutes before she got to my castle. One day in particular I sprinted down my flight of stairs, past the minefield, over the moat and down the only dirt road to my castle. It was evening and I stumbled upon a small cottage not far from my place with the light shining through the open window. I snuck up to it and peered inside to find Clock Woman getting ready to invade my castle. 

She had a few old round clocks and a lasso on the wood table. She had her foot up on a chair, zipping up her red leather boot. The fireplace was crackling in the background as an elderly woman put on another log.

"You're heading out already little lady?" the elderly woman asked.

"Yep. Valencore won't stop himself.”

"How do you plan to stop him? He has a moat you know."

"Well I have time on my side," Clock Woman said, wiggling her gold necklace with a small clock on it.

Right after she said that, my nose tickled and I breathed in deep out of reflex. I let out a sneeze of a lifetime, knocking myself to the ground and mud flying everywhere. The next thing I saw was Clock Woman standing over me.

"Who are you?" she said, with her arms crossed.

She didn't recognize me from all the mud over my face, so I decided to use it to my advantage.

"I'm sorry for the eavesdropping, Miss. Did I hear you right, you were going to stop Valencore?"

"Yes. But that still doesn't answer who you are?"

"I'm Val...Valentine. Henry Valentine," I said, getting to my feet, wiping the mud off my cloak.

"Well Henry, I can't have you running off telling people I'm here so you're going to come with me."

"Uh...okay."

I still don't get her logic on that one, but no reason to argue. We made our way down the path and I decided to make some small talk. After all, this was the most amicable I had ever seen her.

"So, what is your plan? To stop Valencore?"

"First I need to free my sidekick, Franzwa."

"Who's that?" I asked but I knew the answer. He was this little monkey of hers. I captured him to lure her to my castle in the first place. In hindsight it was dumb to place him in the dungeon, near the lava pits. His death also would reset my day, which happened at least 400 times from spontaneous combustion or simply falling in the lava trying to free himself. Don't know which since I didn't watch every time.

"He is my best friend. We do everything together. Watch movies, garden, fight crime."

"Sounds like a pretty cool guy."

"He's a monkey."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Sounds like a pretty cool monkey."

She laughed. "He is."

"And the next step?"

"I don't know. Wing it I guess. I have plenty of time."

She had no idea how right she was. We got to the castle, which from the outside looked much more hostile than I remembered it. Jagged cobblestone walls and a giant drawbridge did a good job at being imposing, not to mention the gators thrashing around in the moat below.

"This is my stop. You stay here and don't go playing with the gators. I'll be back in no time," she said with a smile.

It was that moment I knew she was special. My whole view of her changed. Not of someone trying to ruin my plans, but of a young woman who just wanted to make sure her friend was safe. Even my plans of world domination seemed hollow in comparison. I heard the explosion go off again and knew it was my cue to start again.

That day forward I went to her everyday. Some days were shorter than others and there was the occasional surprise, but I made the effort. I got to learn everything about her. From her love for pastry and romance novels to her dislike of boy bands. Everyday was both magical and deeply unsettling. I grew to love her kind heart and positivity that never quit. And hated myself for being the cause of her repeated death.

It was our four year anniversary since we first truly met, or at least I met her. Was kind of a one-sided relationship since she remembered nothing, but I wanted to do something special for her nonetheless. I was going to tell her how I feel about her. In my mind it sounded more romantic than it was.

I ran down to the dungeon and freed Franzwa, like I did everyday since I talked to her. He kicked me in the balls every time, but I deserved it. I walked around the landmines and lowered the drawbridge. I stood there with the monkey wiggling in my arms, waiting to see her smiling face again.

In no time she arrived, sporting her normal look.

"Unhand my monkey fiend!"

That was a new one. I let go of the monkey and he ran to her on all fours, jumping up onto her shoulder like a parrot would for his captain.

"Surrender Valencore! You are no match for me!"

I put my hands up and smiled. "I surrender.”

I walked a few steps on the drawbridge. "Can I tell you something? It's going to be a lot to hear."

She raised her eyebrows. "Okay?"

"I have been reliving this day over and over for the last few years. You have broken into this castle countless times and never survived. I wanted to apologize for what I had done to you...”

"Is that all?"

"No. I wanted to say...I love you. Ever since that day we walked together to my castle, I knew you were special. I just didn't know how special. These last four years with you have been wonderful and torturing. I know you don't feel the same way about me, but I would like you to give me a chance. I've changed a lot in four years and I don't want to live another day knowing you will forget me."

Clock Woman walked up to Valencore, close enough to smell the wood fire on her clothes. She turned the tiny dial on her clock necklace to twelve.

"You're free."

Truce of Flames

"Lord Verdan, please be reasonable?" Princess Regent asked.

Lord Verdan's piece of steak was almost to his lips. The salty gristle called his name, but turned to char in an instant. His fork glowed red with his anger.

"Reasonable? You made a fire station right outside my Kingdom!" Lord Verdan said, pointing his fork, flinging the burnt meat into his cobblestone castle wall. 

"Your fires were getting out of control. I had to protect our forest."

"Those trees could use a good pruning."

"TipTap Forest is a sacred place for my people. Nowhere else can you find such strong and beautiful hardwoods."

"And that fire station is an insult to mine. In my father's time, it would have been a declaration of war."

"You know my intentions."

He cocked his head and raised his eyebrows. "Do I?"

"Come on, Vernny.”

"No!" He pounded the dark oak table, leaving scorch marks in his fist's wake. "You don't get to call me that anymore."

Princess Regent pushed away from the table and got up. Her red and black dress contrasted with her blonde hair. She walked around the table toward him. Her hand ran along the oak table, feeling every imperfection against her soft hand. Lord Verdan got up as well to meet her. Their footsteps echoed in harmony within the chamber until they stopped inches from each other. His eyes flickered like a wood fire roaring from a dose of gasoline. She stared back at him, determined to find the truth.

"Why don't you tell me why you're really mad?"

"Because you don't trust my people."

"You know that's not true."

He scoffed and walked away from her. She followed him, unwilling to let him get away.

"Come on. I'm trying to stop a war here. But we can't do that if you won't be reasonable."

He spun around, stopping her dead in her tracks.

"I am being reasonable. You remove the fire station. It is simple as that."

"But I have no guarantee that you will protect the forest."

"And you won't get one."

"Do you not see the problem?"

"I don't see a problem with that forest burning down. Brought enough pain to my family."

"You weren't the only one who lost a mother that day."

"I didn't just lose my mother that day," he said, unable to look at her anymore. 

"I didn't know you had more family in the forest that day."

"I didn't," he said quietly.

"Then who did you lose that meant so much to you?"

"You."

Her mouth opened like she was going to say something, but nothing came out. She froze there while the crackling of the fire lit lanterns above claimed the brief silence. 

"When our mothers died. You were whisked off to the castle to rule your kingdom and I was left with my father. He was bitter after she died and took it out on me. You were the only light in my life and just like my mother you were taken from me. That forest only reminds me of that day."

She reached her hand out to him. "I never knew. You never wrote.”

"Oh I did. Every night. I found out later my father's manservant would burn them. By the time I took the throne, I figured whatever relationship we had sizzled out."

She put her hands on his shoulders and smiled. "Well a sizzled out fire just needs to be stirred up a bit.”

She grabbed his hand and pulled him past his seat to the balcony. The moon shined like the sun upon the land as people below danced and music rose up to them.

"How about a dance, Vernny?"

He smiled and wrapped his arm around her waist. They swayed back and forth with the music, holding each other like long lost lovers. Nothing was spoken for two songs, but each minute they danced together it was like getting back a year they lost. When the last song stopped, they just looked into each other's eyes, playing a game of chicken on who would speak first.

"I had a wonderful evening," she said.

"As did I. And I was thinking...about that fire station..."

"Consider it gone."

"No. I was hoping it would stay."

"Really?"

"If you don't mind some of my people working there. I'm sure they would appreciate the new job opportunities."

"I would like that."

"And besides. How could I take away your dream job as a ballerina-princess-firefighter? That would be cruel."

She laughed and hugged him tight. "I'm glad I came tonight."

"Me too."

Life and Death Go On A Date

A chill filled the air and brought with it the echoes of the undead yearning to return to the land of the living. Death was pushing a rotten head down, trying to return it to the patch of wet ground it had sprouted up from.

"Push it down!" Life said, holding her lantern up.

"I'm trying!" Death said, still struggling to push the zombie under the ground.

The zombie's arms were flailing about until it grabbed Death's pristine cloak, pulling him into the dirt.

"No, Death!" Life said, running to his aid.

"No! Don't!" Death said.

She ran to the tombstone and pushed it over. Death rolled to the side and the tombstone crushed the zombie with a muted crack. He got up to his feet and brushed the dirt off his cloak, almost slinging mud on her blue and white dress.

"I thought you were going to touch the ground again." 

"I learned my lesson. Don't touch cemetery ground. Check."

Death chuckled and shook his head.

"I didn't realize you could reanimate the dead," Death said.

"I didn't either. I guess I'm full of surprises."

"So...what do you think?"

"About what?"

He gestures to the rows of tombstones. "About this."

"I have never been to a cemetery before. My mother never really approved of such a place and it's not exactly a normal spot you ask a date out to."

"Oh…"

"But I'm glad you brought me. It is peaceful...besides the zombies."

"It really is...Hey, I want to show you something."

Death took her hand and led her past the rows of graves to a small stone circle in the center of the grounds. His hand was still wet, but she didn't care. It was the most assertive he had been all night and she was curious to learn what made him tick. The stone circle had text engraved into it from a language she did not recognize.

"What is it?"

"I'll show you." He stood on top of it and it started to glow green.

"Woah."

"Come on. The best part is standing on it. It feels good."

She walked to it and tripped on the edge. Death caught her before she touched the ground. 

"Watch your step.”

She looked into his eyes and saw something she didn't notice before. A kindness, soft and gentle. His white eyes looked more like puffy clouds than the soulless void she saw earlier at dinner. He stood her up and she immediately felt a tickling sensation run up her legs.

She giggled. "It tickles."

"Yeah it does. Whenever I'm in the mortal world I come here to relax. Get away from the hustle and bustle of death."

"Aren't the dead...you know. Dead."

"Not in my experience. On the other side I get to deal with who you saw earlier. Dead people after death are a wild bunch. Lot of work. But here. They are peaceful and at ease."

"That's fascinating. I always figured when people die they stopped living."

"No. They just torment me...that's actually why I wanted to go out with you tonight. To thank you.”

"For what? Taking away your job?"

"Every person you save is another second of rest I get. I wouldn't even be here if you weren't so good at your job. You're pretty amazing to take more on just so I can enjoy things like this. Like going out with a beautiful woman.”

Her cheeks turned scarlet and patted her skirt down. "You think I'm beautiful?"

"Life is the most beautiful thing in the world. Without you there would be nothing. I would be nothing."

Life stood inches away from him, eating up every word. She leaned in close before a shockwave shot out from the stone they were on. Green smoke rose from the dirt and the moans of the undead surrounded them. 

"Uh oh," Life said, looking down at her bare foot on the stone. 

"That can't be good."

Zombie arms punched out of the ground and their cries became louder as they emerged. Death's mouth dropped. He could feel his father's rage banging inside his head. His stomach turned thinking about breakfast with him tomorrow.

"Look on the bright side. You have less work to do now.”