A Henchman Screwed Up

A lone henchmen in a yellow jumpsuit paced back and forth outside his boss's office. He knew what it was about. The bank job.

It was supposed to be flawless with no casualties. They had a man on the inside and all that needed to be done was take the money. Unfortunately, not all jobs go according to plan.

"I am ready for you, Jenkins," Jaster called to his henchman.

Jenkins took a deep breath and opened the door, seeing Jaster leaning back in his comfy chair. He noticed his red tie was loosened and seemed rather relaxed, despite the major screw up that happened yesterday.

"Take a seat." Jaster motioned to the chair on the other side of his paper ridden desk.

Jenkins gingerly approached and sat down, avoiding eye contact. He was sure his boss's calm demeanor was going to snap at any moment. There was silence between them for a few seconds before Jaster realized Jenkins wasn't going to say anything, unless prompted.

"Do you know why you are here?" Jaster asked.

Jenkins lifted his head up to face his fear. He knew better than to disrespect his employer. "Because of my failure at the bank job."

"I wouldn't call what you did a failure, but it has complicated things."

"What can I do to make amends, sir?"

Jaster chuckled and turned his monitor toward Jenkins. "I think you need to see this."

On the screen there were several caped heroes standing around a large monitor. Those heroes were watching surveillance footage of the bank job. The surveillance footage showed the moment Jenkins screwed up big time. He had the cash in a briefcase and was almost out the door when three blue clad heroes stopped in front of him.

Two of the heroes were a young man and woman, no older than twenty. They both had blonde hair and were clearly siblings. The hero in the middle was a muscular, elderly gentleman who wore a white skullcap on his head and wielded a wrench the size of a sledgehammer. Jenkins didn't need to watch to know what happened next.

"Stop right there," the elderly hero said.

Jenkins pulled out his handgun and shakily pointed it at the heroes, which was met with laughter.

"What do you think you are going to do with that?" The younger man proclaimed, almost doubled over laughing.

"I guess he hasn't heard of us," the woman said between breaths.

The elderly man spun the wrench in his hands and smiled. "Put the gun down and I won't cripple you for life."

"Move aside old man! I don't want to hurt you."

"Chrissy. Carl." The elderly man said to his sidekicks. "Would you like to do the honors this time?"

"Gladly."

Before Jenkins could react, Chrissy and Carl appeared on both sides of him and held his arms. Jenkins tried to resist, but their grip on him only tightened as he struggled. He tried to pull the trigger out of desperation, but Carl's hand slid along Jenkins's forearm, up to his hand and broke his trigger finger.

Jenkins screamed in pain and dropped the suitcase, but stubbornly held onto the gun.

"Drop the gun too, or I'll break another finger," Carl ordered.

"Hey, save some fingers for me, bro," Chrissy said.

"Take it easy you two. He's just a henchman. Save it for a real villain." The elderly man marched up to him and lifted Jenkins's head up with his giant wrench. "I'm giving you a chance to walk away. All you have to do is tell me who hired you."

"I can't do that."

"Yes you can." The elderly man glanced at the gun still shaking in Jenkins hand. "Drop the gun. Let's talk this out."

Jenkins closed his eyes and did as he was told. The gun clattered to the ground and discharged three times. Jenkins flinched as the shots went off and the three heroes fell to the floor. In a panic, Jenkins picked up the briefcase and ran for the door. The surveillance footage cut out as Jenkins accidentally kicked his own gun, which shot out the camera in the bank. It was all the heroes in the room needed to see to come to their own conclusion.

"He is no henchman," one of the heroes chimed in.

"Clearly that was an accident," another hero said, pointing at the now blank screen. "Guns are dangerous."

"That was no accident. A gun doesn't fall to the ground and mow down an entire family of heroes. It was intentional. He knew who he was facing and lured them into a false sense of security. We need to take this threat seriously. Even Jaster couldn't take out Wrenchman by himself."

There were murmurs among the group, all trying to talk at once before a different voice stood out from the bunch.

"What should we do now?" another hero asked.

Before any of the heroes could answer, Franz walked through the double doors, ready to answer that question. "Star Princess, I want you to check on Wrenchman's kids. They are in stable condition. Make sure they don't get any ideas of going on a vendetta."

"I hate when you use my hero name. Just call me–"

Franz put his finger over his lips. "Hero names only. I looked into Wrenchman's files. He was tracking this mystery man's communications for some time. This was a highly sophisticated job that required lots of resources. I wouldn't put it past whoever is behind this that they could have counter surveillance capability."

"You can't be serious? You think we have been bugged?"

"If they can have an inside man at the bank, why not here?"

Jaster turned the monitor away and shut it off, watching Jenkins's reaction. His terrified face stared back at Jaster.

"Boss…they think I am a super villain."

"They sure do."

"Bu–but I'm not. It was an accident."

Jaster nodded his head. "I know. In hindsight I should've never given you a gun for something so trivial. Now they are going to want blood for blood."

"They're gonna kill me?"

Jaster got up from his seat and went around the desk. He put his hand on Jenkins's shoulder. "You aren't going to die. I'll make sure of that."

"How?"

"Leave that to me. In the meantime, keep up the good work. I appreciate your dedication to discretion, but I won't put you in a position like that again."

Jenkins didn't know what to say, stunned to see he got off so easily. He heard stories of how henchmen were treated with other villains, so he expected such a screw up to yield similar results.

"Am I…free to go?"

"Of course, but not before a little word of advice," Jaster said.

Jenkins gulped, thinking this was it. Here comes the switcheroo.

"When you're outnumbered, surrender. Creates unnecessary health insurance claims."

"I have health insurance?" Jenkins asked in astonishment.

"Holy shit." Jaster went over to the door. "Jenny, did you not tell our new employees they have health benefits?"

Around the corner, there was frantic clicking of a keyboard. "Umm…it might have slipped my mind."

Jaster sighed. "Well you can't clock out until you have told everyone."

Dainty footsteps came rushing to the door as a red haired young woman came into the office. Her thick black frame glasses barely stayed on her nose as she hugged a clipboard.

"Please, Jaster. Can I do it tomorrow? I have a baseball game to go to with my boyfriend tonight."

"I recall buying you those tickets."

Jenny whimpered, doing her best impression of a sad puppy dog pout. Jaster wasn't one to succumb to such actions, but he hated his money going to waste. Also, Jenny was otherwise a great employee. No one quite handled accounting problems like she did, not to mention any errands he needed done in a hurry.

"Fine. For the record though, I still don't approve of your boyfriend. You can find better than him."

Jenny gave him a big hug. "Thank you! You're the best boss ever!"

"Don't say that too loud or everyone is going to think I've gone soft. It's a pain to have to assert my authority the old fashion way," Jaster said and got her off of him. She smiled up at him, waiting for him to finish his thought. "Get Jenkins a copy of his health insurance card so he can get that hand looked at."

"Will do!"

Jenkins watched as Jenny pranced off to get his card. It was strange working for a villain who seemed so… caring. Word on the street was Jaster was a ruthless villain who made heroes piss themselves at the mere mention of his name. The man he saw here was a far cry from the stories he was told.

Jaster turned back to look at Jenkins, noticing the confusion hidden in his eyes. Jaster knew of his own reputation and how important it was to maintain a balance of fear with respect.

"I want you to know, when you work for me, you are my family. I will treat you fairly and watch out for you. If you betray my family though, you will be dealt with." Jaster picked up a stress ball on his desk and crushed it with one hand. The ball made an audible pop and was doomed to never regain its original form as he tossed it in the garbage. "You understand."

"Yes, sir."

"Drop the sir stuff. Call me Jaster. Everyone else does."

***